Why "Messy Abundance"?

At the encouragement of one of my "iron friends", I'm beginning a new journey--one of 'blogger.'  More than anything else, I'm seeking to be a blessing, by sharing the things I feel like God drops in my spirit.  Life is hard and challenging and beautiful and incredible, and with the Lord as my partner on the journey, I seek only to navigate its twists and turns with His perspective.  Please understand that I'm fully aware of my fallibility, but I think that the time is right to venture into this medium.  So, here goes! Here's the premise for the title of my blog, Messy Abundance:

One day, I went for a pedicure. The lady that was assigned to me appeared to be a recent immigrant who spoke very little English, so our conversation was limited to what services I could point out on the "menu", and what complimentary beverage I wanted. I settled in to the chair with my trusty iPad, reading 2 Samuel.

Soon, the woman next to me had struck up a conversation with the woman on the other side of her, as it was apparent they were already acquainted. My neighbor began speaking of her out-of-state daughter's upcoming baby shower, for which she was footing the bill. She began sharing at length how expensive it was all going to be, as her daughter wanted to have it in a hotel banquet room, with elaborate centerpieces, meal, and drinks. "Her wedding wasn't that long ago," she sighed. "It feels like a wedding reception all over again."

Then she began telling her friend about how glad she was that she had lived alone all these years (divorcing from her children's father long ago), and how she could NEVER imagine marrying again. She was very happy to keep her own hours; to come and go as she wished; her house was always immaculate, and she didn't have to cook, ever, if she didn't want to.

Now, I have no idea what her married life was like, and I understand that many people endure relationships that are cold, destructive and even dangerous. I know some have been betrayed, and feel leaving is their only way of escape. But she didn't sound like a woman at peace; she sounded like a woman whose bitterness and resentment had built a wall that would be unscalable, a barrier that colored every relationship she would ever have. As she listed her reasons for being thankful for her solitary life, I felt more and more burdened for her.

I can't remember the last time you could describe my house as immaculate; I have to consider what we'll do about supper on a daily basis, though I don't cook as often as I should. There's always laundry to do, and sometimes I think I'll never be caught up. I often think that Wyatt's toys took the command to "be fruitful and multiply" to heart, for we seem to be reaching critical mass.

While I often wish I was more on top of things, and that my home was more orderly, I honestly wouldn't trade any of it for her sterile, "immaculate" life. I longed for so many years for the laughter and love of a child, and as I watch my son grow, I am struck with how quickly it is passing. Perhaps it's from becoming a mom at an advanced age; perhaps it's simply the perspective that God has placed in my heart through His Spirit, but I know that I frequently look at my son, staring at him, trying to etch moments in my memory. I stroke his sweet face, relish his unrestrained hugs, marvel at his wit, wonder at his perspective, and cherish his kind and thoughtful heart. How could I ever prefer solitude over that?

And my husband? Well, that's a whole other layer of gratitude. Chris is truly my best friend, my champion, my protector, my biggest fan; he has been faithful and true to me, and to my son. "I have found the one whom my soul loves," is an accurate description. My heart is completely secure. I know many don't have that, but I can only thank God for bringing me the one He planned for me, and for giving me the sense to desire His choice for me above my own flawed reasoning. Our home is a sanctuary of love and care, and the peace of God is the most treasured member of our family.

I wish I could have taken the lady's hand, and somehow shared with her, in a moment, what life could be. I wish I could have shown her a glimpse into the true happiness that is available through a relationship with Jesus Christ. Looking at things through His eyes is a true perspective-adjuster. Maybe that's why I can't resent the "inconvenient" things in my life. A few piles of laundry, a few forgotten Legos, a few dishes in the sink--they're just signs of the extraordinary blessings that a loving God has been generous enough to heap upon my life. "Pressed down, shaken together, running over...." Some people see the "mess" when things run over. Perhaps, instead, we should focus on the ABUNDANCE.

I hope you'll come with me on this incredible voyage, for we have much to learn together.  God bless the journey!